It's too cold outside for Angels to fly
by AllTimeNatalie
Summary: He couldn't look her in the eyes, not after what he'd done, not after he'd left her, not after he'd seen her in that hospital bed knowing he'd caused it. Channy and angst. Rating changed because of angst in alternate ending.
1. Chapter 1

**Don't own Sonny with a Chance and the title is from a song called 'A-Team' by Ed Sheeran. **

**Summary: He couldn't look her in the eyes, not after what he'd done, not after he'd left her, not after he'd seen her in that hospital bed. Channy **

**Title: It's cold for Angels to fly**

Her head pounded. The rush of a hospital on a Saturday night together with the constant squeak of Chad's shoes coupled with the insistent whine of ambulances united with Nico's painful sobs. Her head pounded. Chad paced the exact same spot again and again, every time muttering almostsilently_ it's all my fault. _Tawni stood and turned, her eyes fighting back the continuous flow of tears that had formed.

"I'm going getting some air." Nico followed her out of the waiting room. And then there were two. Grady was silent, he had been the entire night. He remained in the same waiting room chair with his head in his hands noiselessly weeping. Chad finally sat down and fell into a comatose-like stillness. He still mumbled to himself. The freezing draught of winter in Hollywood blew in through the door and made them both shiver. Tiny specks of the freshly fallen rain crashed outside the hospital. Tawni sighed and dropped her gaze. She couldn't hide the fact that she loved Sonny as a sister anymore than she could that she loved herself. It was a fact that was clearly evident. Her eyes were crimson from her weeping and tired. She'd been the one that had found Sonny in the first place, she'd been the one that had pulled her from the grips of death and phoned the hospital.

"It's not your fault Chad, just calm down." Grady spoke for the first time that night. Chad stared at him, eyes wild, hair stuck out in different directions, tears evident.

"It is though, I pushed her away, I left her. I shouldn't have but I did, I just walked out on her and I made her do it, if I'd stayed it would've been fine but now my girlfriend is in there fighting for her life. Now you look me in the eyes and you tell me this is gonna be okay?" His mind recoiled the night before, to the night his entire world disintegrated and fell apart right before his eyes. He hadn't meant to push her over the edge but the constant reminders about how he was being selfish and he didn't care hurt him to. He though of the way she said _"You don't love me at all and I don't love you." _That was the main blow. That was the knife that was stuck in his heart and twisted until he'd bled out. Each work stabbed at his stomach like tiny painful pin-pricks, each glare her eyes gave him, each sordid, dirty, hurtful glare that she shot at him were like repetitive punches to his gut. He couldn't take it anymore. He stood up and began to cry, tiny, meaningless droplets of his anguish just pouring from his system.

"It wasn't meant to happen! I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry!" He punched at the wall of Sonny's hospital room, recurring blows that left a red glow on his fists. "Sonny please don't do this to me!" He broke into fits of sobbing, his legs felt limp, his eyes felt heavy. Grady dropped a hand on his shoulder, his eyes scanning the dents his punches had made in the wall.

"Dude, come on, it'll be fine." Chad stood straight, a tear falling and crashing on the floor. He sniffled back the rest of the fresh, dewy load and sat cross-legged next to the door. "Chad," Before he could finish, Chad interrupted him.

"I want to be as close to my baby as possible." He mumbled, leaning his head back and making a soft thud as it hit the wall. "Come on Sonny, come one." He sighed and rested his hand next to his head on the wall. "Pull through."

**A/N: Okay, you decide what happens, should Sonny live? Hope you liked it and I'm sorry it's so short and angsty but longer chapters I promise after this one. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Don't own Sonny with a Chance and the title is from a song called 'A-Team' by Ed Sheeran. **

**Summary: He couldn't look her in the eyes, not after what he'd done, not after he'd left her, not after he'd seen her in that hospital bed. Channy **

**Title: It's cold for Angels to fly**

**A/N: Oh my gee, five reviews in one night? WOW! You all know that you rock right? Well, I wanna make everyone happy so I'm doing two alternate endings, in one she lives, in one she dies. You decide which you read but in this one she lives. **

Chad stood, his eyes still glued to the floor and his head still spinning. Without explanation, he left the hall room, he left Sonny. When he was in the bathroom, he stared at himself in the mirror.

_How can you look yourself in the eye? You left her again. But it's okay because it wouldn't be the first time would it? You always leave whoever you get close to. You just walk away because you're too scared of commitment. You only ever care about yourself. You don't care about Sonny, you never did, you just knew she was easy because she loved you. You're a user. You're a creep. You're NOTHING! _

"Shut up!" His voice broke as he shouted, his emotions mixing with adrenaline in his mind. He slammed his fist into the mirror and stared at the crimson liquid as it trickled down his hand and dripped onto the floor, seeping into the intricate tiles. He screamed, sliding down the wall and landing on the floor. He used to be Sonny's superhero. She used to look up to him but then it all changed because he made one fatal mistake… he fell in love with her. He became too obsessed, too protective. She didn't want it to all fall apart but they couldn't hold together something that wasn't working. Chad couldn't make their relationship any better; he couldn't give Sonny what she wanted. He stood again and stared at the shattered glass revealing his broken reflection. He didn't know who it was staring back at him. It wasn't him, it was a monster. His hand was still bleeding fairly badly but he blocked out the pain that came with his release and bit his lip. The door swung open and he was back in the familiar monotone hallway. He wished he could reverse time; he could re-build whatever it was that he had smashed to pieces. A nurse took his hand and pulled him into a ward for medical attention.

He couldn't speak, he didn't want to speak. His eyes held back tears; he wouldn't allow them to cry anymore. His mind blocked out everything that had happened. When his hand was bandaged, the nurse smiled. He couldn't hear. All he could hear was the replaying noise of shattering glass in his ear like a broken vinyl that continued to play the same mistakes again and again. He smiled an appreciation and left the room, his heart pounded out of his chest.

"You can see her now, she's fine." The shattering of glass stopped and his head flooded with relief and panic. What would she say? What should he have said? He rushed into Sonny's room but stopped when he was in the doorway. She looked so frail and broken. Her hair was limp and tied behind her, dark circles lingered under her eyes. He shivered. It was awful seeing her in this state, even worse knowing it was because he wanted to love her too much. Wordlessly, he wrapped his arms around her neck and pulled her close to him.

"I am so sorry! Sonny please forgive me." He pulled away to stare into her eyes. They looked dead, she looked dead. She sighed and tried to speak but a ball formed in her throat and she was choking on her own words. "Please." She pulled him close, their lips meeting. Chad bent down to wrap his arms around her waist.

"It's okay." She mumbled her voice low and broken, feeble and delicate, close to cracking. "I shouldn't have taken it that far, I didn't want to live without you!" Chad shook his head and pulled her close again. His heart beat in time with hers; her head slowly rose and fell with his slow and steady breaths.

"I don't care Sonny; I love you more than anything in this world. Do you know how hard it was to stare at my reflection without wanting to just kill myself for what I'd done? I left you because I wasn't strong enough to be this committed." She smiled and closed her eyes, tiny tears squeezing free. She shook from the frozen air outside. It had started snowing.

"I love you too." She took his hand, the rough surgical covering hitting her attention. Her fingers lingered over it for a second longer until her fingers intertwined with his and she pulled him to be nose to nose with her. "What happened to your hand?"

"Oh, I just cut it, it's fine baby, don't worry. Listen Sonny, I'm…" She cut him off with a kiss, her soft lips pressed against his, their hands joined. His free hand ran through her hair slowly, pushing her closer.

"Don't." She whispered and smiled at Grady who loitered in the doorway as Chad had. "Come in." He grinned sheepishly and pointed to a doctor.

"Can't, one at a time thing, I'll just wait here." He feebly waved and turned to read the medial notices on the wall.

**A/N: I'll do the second chapter later but I'm almost in tears for writing too much angst, I can't bring myself to write Sonny dying yet. :- ( Thank you for all your reviews, I hope I didn't disappoint. **

**Much Love. **


	3. Alternate ending

**Don't own Sonny with a Chance and the title is from a song called 'A-Team' by Ed Sheeran. **

**Summary: He couldn't look her in the eyes, not after what he'd done, not after he'd left her, not after he'd seen her in that hospital bed. Channy **

**Title: It's cold for Angels to fly**

**A/N: Ok so I understand some of you don't want to read this one but I got one review supposing a different ending so here it is. Warnings: Angst, death, self harm. May run over two chapters but it depends. Thank you for the other reviews though, means a lot. **

**An Alternate Ending **

Time seemed to stand still; each ticking minute that passed was like another stab at him. His heart pounded at a thousand miles an hour. His eyes formed more and more crystals of water that he tried to blink back. Tawni appeared in front of him, hair limp from the rain, mascara tracks down her face. He put that either down to the weather or her tears. Chad stood, he couldn't take this anymore. He couldn't sit around and wait any longer. It was tearing him limb from limb.

"Chad, I'm sorry." Tawni whispered, her voice breaking slightly. Though it tore her apart to say it, to actually admit it, she couldn't imagine her life without Sonny. She'd been the sister that never had. She'd looked after her, stopped her from doing regrettable things, she'd saved her in a lot of dangerous situations. She'd saved her broken heart many times from failed boyfriends. Chad stared at her, his eyes flaring with both tears and anger.

"Don't say that! Don't you dare say that, she's gonna be fine okay?" She nodded. His denial pulled at her heart strings, it was sad to see him this way. His normally blue eyes were red and burning. His pale, flawless skin was soaked with tears and branded by the painful red glow that he'd been rubbing away many tears. The excruciating noise of machines rang from Sonny's room. Chad jumped from the floor and rushed to the door that lead to her room. A pained scream ran through his ears. Sonny's scream ran through his ears.

"Chad let them deal with her! You'll only get in the way!" Tawni screamed at him but he wouldn't listen. Finally, he turned to face her.

"My girlfriend needs me more than ever, I'm not going to sit around and watch her die!" Chad tried the door but the doctors were inside her room attempting resuscitation. Chad pounded at the door, begging them to let him be with her. "I need to see her! Please!" After half an hour of attempting to bring back the most important person in Chad's life, the door swung open and he was greeted by a tall, skinny doctor.

"I'm sorry Mr Cooper, we couldn't save her. The cuts were too deep, it's a surprise she lived this long. We did all we could." He mumbled, his eyes almost drawing tears when Chad screamed and fell to the floor. He had everything and it still wasn't good enough. He had a girlfriend, a perfect, beautiful, amazing girlfriend. He had a job that anyone would risk anything for. He had the dream life and he walked away from it. Chad stood, his legs shaking. He almost fell again but the doctor caught him. "I'm so sorry. There was nothing else we could've done." Chad nodded wordlessly, his voice had disappeared. He was breathless. He felt like he was walking on air, the light headed feeling that evaded his senses made him shake. Finally, he spoke.

"I know. Can I see her?" The doctor nodded and stepped aside to allow him to enter the room. "Oh Sonny, why did you do it?" He mumbled to her lifeless, comatose body. "It's all my fault. I'm so sorry Sonny. I left you and I shouldn't have! I couldn't be the perfect boy you wanted, you deserved. I love you. I love you more than any words can say, more than any action can perform. I promise you Sonny Munroe, I will find a way for us to be together, just you wait. I'll never leave you again, I'll find a way." He pressed his lips to hers and squeezed tears from his crystal clear azure eyes. He pulled away and pulled her to him, her cold, dead body against his. His heart still beat out of his stomach when she was near him. The doctor lingered in the doorway like an unseen ghost.

"She shouted for you when she was dying. She screamed your name; she wanted to tell you she loved you." Chad nodded; he had no more tears to offer to her. He'd cried them all already. He left the room in silence, his head down. When he was in the bathroom, he splashed old water over his face, rubbing it into his eyes to cleanse the sting that had been causing a consistent pain. When he stared himself in the mirror, he couldn't look his reflection in the eyes. He just couldn't.

"It's my fault." He muttered again and punched a fist into the mirror. The glass shattered around him and made a horrible clatter as his skin broke the picture of his own life that was displayed before his very eyes. He screamed in pain, his eyes gazing down the crimson liquid that trickled down his broken flesh to stain the intricate tiling on the floor. He stared at the glass. It was tempting him to just take his own life. He picked it up and felt the sharp edge glide across the floor before it left its touch.

_I can. I can't. I should. I must. _

A hand pulled his hand away from his wrist.

"Don't." Grady muttered, the glass falling and shattering into smaller particles on the floor. "It's not what Sonny would have wanted." Chad saw Grady in the remnants of the broken reflection.

"I have to. I can't live without Sonny. I can't go on without _my _Sonny Munroe. Everything reminds me of her, Grady. Everything I look at I see her." He stared into the destroyed mirror and sighed. "I don't know what to do." Grady, for the first time in his life time, pulled Chad into his arms and felt the tiny droplets of freshly formed tears soak his t-shirt.

"It's alright dude, it gets easier and it'll pass eventually." Chad shook his head and met Grady's eyes. "It takes time."

"It won't, not this time. It won't go away; this constant feeling of guilt that swells in my stomach just won't leave me alone! I can't forget that I caused this. I left her; I said all that stuff that wasn't true. I walked out when she needed me the most. I just feel so unwanted and alone. I can't see my life without her. I planned out entire life out. I was gonna propose, we'd get married and have kids; we'd grow old in a huge house with a dog and a Pickett fence. It'd be the perfect life but now, it's all been taken away from me and I can't go on like this. I can't keep lying to myself saying it'll be ok." Grady sighed, he'd never been in love but he could imagine how it felt to lose the one you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with.

"I love her." He whispered, his blonde fringe falling into his eyes. "I love her more than the world and if I have to take my own life to be with her, then so be it."

**A/N: Sorry for the angst and death but here's alternate ending No.2. Hope you like and it didn't disappoint. **


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